Everybody is talking about the SuperBrawl tag match
pitting Kevin Nash and Lex Luger against Konnan and Rey Misterio Jr. If the
nWo guys win, Rey Jr. has to take off his mask.
If Konnan and Rey Jr. win, Elizabeth has to shave her head.
It seems pretty straight up.
But is it?
Let's examine some possible variables that could affect this match.
What if Rey Jr. wants to lose his mask? Yeah, I know, taking off the mask
would violate a time-honored luchador tradition, blah, blah, blah, blah,
blah. Hear me out.
Look at Juventud Guerrera. He lost his mask to Chris Jericho. Juvi cried
on camera, told his father he loved him, the whole ball of weepy wax.
But, after taking off the mask, Juvi's career took off. He started winning
cruiserweight titles. He got more pay-per-view matches. He got more popular.
American fans accepted him more -- we still don't quite get the mask gimmick
in the good old U.S. of A. Juvi's not a bad-looking kid -- he probably started
getting more mamacitas, too.
You don't think Rey Jr. noticed all that?
Don't forget, either, that Rey Jr. has been chummy with some of the Wolfpac
guys occasionally. They let him leave the ring and avoid harm on Nitro recently
while they were administering a savage beating to a bunch of luchadors. They
kicked Rey Jr.'s tush once, true, but at least they gave him one free pass.
That's more than they give most people.
What if a deal has been made? Rey Jr. turns on Konnan, takes off the mask,
and joins the Wolfpac. I've seen stranger things.
What if Konnan still has Wolfpac ties? OK, so they beat him silly. It sure
looked like they drummed him out of the Wolfpac.
But the whole thing could have been a set-up to suck Rey Jr. into a trap.
Or maybe the Wolfpac has realized it needs Konnan. I thought he made a nice
addition to the group, and I still think he would be a nice addition. He
gives the 'Pac street credibility.
Without K-Dogg, they're just a bunch of white guys -- and not so fly, either.
Maybe a deal has been made with Konnan. Maybe he's headed back to the Wolfpac.
Maybe he turns on Rey Jr. right off the bat. Maybe the Latino Mighty Mouse
receives a savage 3-on-1 beating, then gets his mask ripped off right along
with his head.
What if Lex Luger is looking to screw Kevin Nash? These two were bitter rivals
for a long time.
Before Luger joined the good-guy version of the Wolfpac, he was a constant
thorn in the side of the original nWo. He actually beat Hollywood Hogan for
the world title. He was the stabilizing force that kept Sting from joining
the black-and-white express. Luger and Nash have loved each other for only
a bit. They hated each other for a long time.
What if Luger turns on Nash? What if Luger wants to see Liz lose her locks?
To tell the truth, I wouldn't mind seeing it myself. I think she'd be a sexy
bald chick.
Maybe the match will be straight up.
If it is, though, how can you pick against Nash and Luger?
Konnan has perhaps the most indomitable spirit in all of wrestling. He believes
in himself and he believes in Rey Jr., who has always been like a little
brother to him. Rey Jr., meanwhile, is an incredible athlete despite his
size. If he were 6-foot-5 instead of 5-foot-5, people would say he has the
best body in WCW. His work ethic away from the ring and his daring style
inside it combine to make him a threat against anybody.
But Nash and Luger are freaks of nature.
Nash is seven feet tall with the mind of a serial killer. He's held nearly
every title in wrestling. If he wanted to, he could pick up Rey Jr. and toss
him like a dart -- oh, wait, he did that once before already. Luger, despite
an arm injury that's slowing him a bit right now, is one of the strongest
men in the wrestling business.
If this bout is straight up, it's a mismatch.
So let's hope for some intrigue.